IT HARDLY MATTERS Back to Main Index Browse the Archives	Tuesday, August 30, 2005 ( 11:19 PM ) From the Onion: Genie Grants Scalia Strict Constructionist Interpretation Of Wish WASHINGTON, DC—A genie freed from a battered oil lamp by Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia granted the conservative jurist a strict constructionist interpretation of his wish for "a hundred billion bucks" Monday. "Sim sim salabim! Your wish is my command!" the genie proclaimed amid flashes of light and purple smoke, immediately filling the Supreme Court building with a massive herd of wild male antelopes. When Justice Scalia complained that the "bucks" had razed the U.S. Supreme Court building, trampling and killing several of his clerks and bringing traffic in the nation's capital to a standstill for hours, the genie said, "Your honor, your wish is a sacred and unalterable document whose interpretation is not subject to the whims of society and changing social context." Monday, August 29, 2005 ( 11:30 PM ) From CNN.com: 50 dead in Mississippi! Or 3. ( 09:46 AM ) The reason people aren't going to movies anymore? Movie suck, that's why! Poor films explains box office slump By Paul Bond Mon Aug 29, 1:47 AM ET LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) - The main reason for the box office slump is the quality of the movies themselves, according to a survey of moviegoers' opinions found in Internet chat rooms and posted on message boards. Even when moviegoers cite other reasons for going to theaters less often than they used to, they still circle back to the quality of films as the root cause for their disaffection, according to research company Brandimensions. For example, potential moviegoers who cited the ease and selection offered by DVD rental firm Netflix as one reason why they visit the multiplex less, then said they were driven to try Netflix because of the dearth of decent theatrical releases. The study found that audiences also cited such other factors as the rising costs of movie tickets, onscreen commercials shown before films and even inadequate parking. But those consumers whose views were collected in the study also said that if the movies were more appealing, they would put up with the other factors. This year's box office take is about 8% lower than it was for the same period a year ago, and the number of tickets sold is off about 11%. Brandimensions searched 1.9 million Internet blogs and chat rooms where users were discussing the box office slump. Relevancy algorithms were used in choosing 1,350 posts to dissect by using software coupled with human data analysts. The result was a 16-page analysis. The sites that were culled in creating the study run the gamut from the obvious, such as iFilm and other movie-related sites, to the not so obvious, such as a site for criticizing the president and another dedicated to professional musicians. In one of its findings, the study said that when a movie's DVD release closely follows its theatrical debut, consumers often consider it the sign of a bad movie. Many Internet chatters also expressed dismay about what they see as Hollywood's incessant focus on piracy and said they'd gladly wait longer for DVD releases if the trade-off were better theatrical releases. The demographic that indicates most that it is seeing fewer movies are males ages 25-49, followed by females in the same age bracket. Those age groups are increasingly deciding that a sporting event or concert offers more value than movies do. "They're not only cross-shopping movies against each other, but they're also cross-shopping movies against other entertainment experiences," Brandimensions chief operating officer Bradley Silver said. Silver said that 44% of Internet chatters on the subject of the box office slump cite bad movies as their reason for shunning theaters, and among those citing other reasons, the quality of films is usually their second or third reason. He also said that the data indicates that even movie stars don't have the same cache as they once did. "With Charles Bronson and Clint Eastwood, you knew what you were getting," he said. But, he added, with many current stars, audiences don't often know exactly what a movie promises. Asked to sum up the attitude of disaffected moviegoers, Bradley said: "Going to the movies used to be fun and exciting. It used to be an event. It's none of those anymore." Thursday, August 25, 2005 ( 10:12 PM ) IM from Erin - Lula0376: saw the pictures of your new house. you guys are totally going to trading space it up Amen, sista! Tuesday, August 23, 2005 ( 11:18 PM ) [Note: Sam is the computer guy at the San Francisco McCann office.] Continued... daktaris: oh man i just walked by his desk Auto response from DocPenfold: I'm doing something away from here. daktaris: i remember talking to him once before ! daktaris: i remember he asked me to get him an iMac daktaris: and i was like sorry dude you're last in line daktaris: oh man should i go apologise to him now daktaris: with a shiny new imac g5 ( 04:51 PM ) So long, Admiral Cartwright... Brock Peters, 1927-2005 ( 01:53 PM ) daktaris: hey DocPenfold: hey daktaris: were you into lemonheads DocPenfold: not extremely daktaris: oh daktaris: well daktaris: me and my coworker heard this rumor about this new guy at work daktaris: so we did some investigating daktaris: http://evandando.co.uk/scrapbook/images/foto13.html daktaris: see the guy on the very left DocPenfold: yes DocPenfold: he's a robot daktaris: http://zlilo.com/~sammich/Picture1.jpg <--- office company directory daktaris: same fucking guy!! DocPenfold: insanity daktaris: heres an earlier one daktaris: http://evandando.co.uk/scrapbook/images/foto22.html daktaris: he works somewhere on the 2nd floor daktaris: i never met him i've seen him around DocPenfold: tell him you love the cover of mrs robinson daktaris: no he left before they went alternapop daktaris: he was like fuck this major label bullshit im getting into advertising DocPenfold: yeah that's why it'd be funny DocPenfold: haha daktaris: or he should sing to me daktaris: my name is bendeily, i work on the 2nd floor daktaris: i work upstairs from you i think you prolly seen me before Sam is so funny. For confirmation, go to BenDeily.com. Thursday, August 18, 2005 ( 10:12 AM ) Dale's thoughts on our nasty toilet at the nü haus (it has since been cleaned...sorta) in relation to his visit in October: Daleschang: I'll bring the blue tablet for the toilet DocPenfold: thanks Daleschang: that will be my housewarming gift! Wednesday, August 17, 2005 ( 08:16 PM ) From the Onion: Capricorn: (Dec. 22—Jan. 19) You knew that house cats liked to play cruelly with their prey before eating it, but you had no idea that they grew to the size of the one outside your door right now. Tuesday, August 16, 2005 ( 02:09 PM ) Charged with larceny! Awesome! Woman accused of beating boyfriend with his wooden leg Although Greg Gale attempted to escape his girlfriend's fury on two legs, he was hindered by a third. The woman, Tammy Johnson, attacked Gale with one of his two prosthetic legs during a domestic dispute on August 3. The couple was drinking beer in Gale's living room when they began to argue about an incident that occurred four years ago, according to Capt. John Oswald of the Midland Police Department in Michigan. Johnson allegedly grabbed Gale's older wooden prosthetic and struck him several times around the head. Gale who was wearing the second leg, a titanium model, retreated towards the front yard while Johnson pursued and continued to hit him. The woman left the scene with the leg after Gale fell in the front yard and yelled for help. A witness riding by on a bike contacted police. Although Gale was bleeding, he did not require medical attention, Oswald said. Johnson was arrested and charged with larceny and assault with a dangerous weapon. Gale's wooden leg has yet to be recovered. ( 09:05 AM ) Sean Connery: I propose a conundrum to you; a riddle, if you will. Alex Trebek: I don't want to hear it. Sean Connery:What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck. I can't remember how it ends but your mother's a whore. - Saturday Night Live Friday, August 12, 2005 ( 12:55 PM ) First there was Crappy Bootleg DVDs, but now there is The Backstroke of the West! (via) ( 11:43 AM ) Talking with Sam this past Tuesday. daktaris: did you see the miranda july movie yet DocPenfold: no daktaris: oh daktaris: you should see it DocPenfold: Rating: R - disturbing sexual content involving children DocPenfold: its like law & order svu daktaris: yes it is awesome Not only that, but he posted some really awesome pictures of his office's putt putt course. Wednesday, August 10, 2005 ( 05:56 PM ) While in the process of shopping around for cabinet hardware for our new kitchen, I came across a website called Knobs N' Knockers. Sadly, it's not everything it could be. Tuesday, August 9, 2005 ( 05:40 PM ) Doth mine eyes deceiveth me? Could it really be true that "Don't Stop Believin" by Journey is on the Itunes top 10? ( 03:22 PM ) "Fate has ordained that the men who went to the moon to explore in peace will stay on the moon to rest in peace." Creepy! Monday, August 8, 2005 ( 03:18 PM ) Whew! For a moment there, I thought the entire world had lost its mind. Not that it really makes any difference now... Two Jackson jurors say they regret acquittal Monday, August 8, 2005; Posted: 3:14 p.m. EDT (19:14 GMT) LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- Two of the 12 jurors who voted to acquit singer Michael Jackson of child molestation and other charges said Monday they regret their decisions. Jurors Ray Hultman and Eleanor Cook, who both have pending book deals, planned to appear Monday night on the MSNBC show "Rita Cosby: Live and Direct." In a preview shown Monday on NBC's "Today," Cosby asked Cook if the other jurors will be angry with her. "They can be as angry as they want to. They ought to be ashamed. They're the ones that let a pedophile go," responded Cook, 79. Hultman, 62, told Cosby he was upset with the way other jurors approached the case: "The thing that really got me the most was the fact that people just wouldn't take those blinders off long enough to really look at all the evidence that was there." ( 12:24 AM ) Rock on forever, Peter Jennings... Thursday, August 4, 2005 ( 10:35 PM ) Okay, so how's this for a small world story? I found out tonight that this guy we know here in Austin, Josh, put together the Lullaby Lullaby compilation, which is one of the few compilations ever made that I actually like! And he was in Audio Armada, too -- a bunch of us were sitting around the Rotheys apartment after we had helped pack up the U-Haul because they're moving to McAllen tomorrow and Josh mentioned how he was in a band and Linda asked him what it was called and he said Audio Armada and I gave him a look as I was processing where I heard the name before...then I asked him Did you have a song called "Obertin" and he said Yeah! and everyone looked at me like Whoa...and then someone asked me how I knew the band and I told them I had a song of theirs on a comp which turned out to be Lullaby Lullaby. The end. Aren't my story-telling skills just the best these days? ( 02:19 PM ) After looking at something like 25 houses, we finally got one! It's a fixer!! Wednesday, August 3, 2005 ( 04:53 PM ) So I was reading about up and coming director Jon Chu and it turns out I went to college with his sister! If you look at his bio, you'll find out that his parents own Chef Chu's and it was funny when Jen told me about how her parents owned Chef Chu's because I had eaten there before. The end. Tuesday, August 2, 2005 ( 11:46 AM ) I'm kinda getting into that My Chemical Romance song "Helena." I should kick my own ass.