IT HARDLY MATTERS Back to Main Index Browse the Archives	Sunday, February 29, 2004 ( 12:35 PM ) HAPPY LEAP YEAR, Y'ALL Tuesday, February 24, 2004 ( 10:32 PM ) Finally! Someone used their head for once, instead of bowing to the pressure of a packed basketball pavillion. Sunday, February 22, 2004 ( 06:44 PM ) From Weather.com: National Forecast Soggy Monday in South Like a spreading rash, rain will expand through the South tonight and tomorrow, infecting all but perhaps Tennessee, the Carolinas and Florida Peninsula by Monday evening. Yes. A rash. Infecting. Wednesday, February 18, 2004 ( 04:44 PM ) From the Onion: Teen Responsible For All Six Items In Clarksburg Police Blotter CLARKSBURG, WV—According to sources at the Clarksburg Telegram, troubled youth Danny Nathum, 17, is responsible for all six items on Monday's police blotter. "We had two disorderly-conduct reports, three counts of vandalism, and one DUI arrest," Telegram assistant editor Jesse Sutton said. "Looks like Mr. Nathum had himself one heck of a busy weekend." Clarksburg, population 16,743, last experienced an all-Nathum crime spree in December, when the teen stole a bicycle, burned down a barn, and punched Old Man Herman. ( 02:15 PM ) So the Ess-Dog will be employed FULL-TIME starting in March. As in 40 hours per week. Fuck the Eagles reunion tour, this is proof that Hell has indeed frozen over. You see, she's never actually worked a true full-time job. The most she ever got was 30-35 hours per week. Wednesday, February 4, 2004 ( 10:42 PM ) So the dreamy fire engine red Hot Snakes shirt that I've been wanting for so long came in the mail today. And guess what! It's too big! And I washed it to see if it would shrink and it didn't! Who wants a bright red Hot Snakes shirt, size medium? Anyone? Doesn't anyone believe in the rock anymore? There are some lessons to be learned from this experience. One: stop buying medium t-shirts! I made a promise to myself months ago that all band shirts that I buy will be smalls, for the trend lately has been for sizes to become larger than before. Ergo, I am now a small. Two: sizes aren't getting larger. I'M SHRINKING. Seriously, though. If you want a Hot Snakes shirt, drop me a line. It's never been worn. ( 06:50 PM ) Celebrity Sighting of the Day: Laura Kightlinger. Where? The Beverly Center.